![Case Note: Pickford & Pickford [2024] FedCFamC1A 249. Where Parental Conflict and Family Violence Part Ways](https://i0.wp.com/coastallawyers.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2024/11/28.png?resize=1080%2C675&ssl=1)
by Kristal Naividi | Jan 21, 2026 | Coastal Lawyers
Family violence allegations feature in a huge chunk of parenting litigation and the Court’s job is to tease out what’s coercive control (or another form of family violence) from what’s honest disagreement between parents.
In Pickford & Pickford, the Full Court of the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia took a deep dive into this challenging question.
The Backstory
The parties in Pickford were a separated couple with two children (9 and 6 years old). After lengthy litigation, the trial judge made final parenting orders giving the mother sole parental responsibility and restricting the father’s time with the children.
The court further found that the father had engaged in coercive and controlling conduct amounting to family violence against the mother.
Unsurprisingly, the father appealed, arguing major legal and factual errors in the trial judge’s findings. One of which was that the evidence did not support a conclusion of family violence in the form of coercive control.
What the Full Court Said
The Full Court’s decision is a useful compass on how ‘family violence’ should be understood in this context.
Two key themes emerged:
1. Not All Conflict Is Family Violence
There was plenty of parental conflict but conflict alone doesn’t automatically equate to family violence. The justices agreed that merely refusing to consent to a particular parenting arrangement or vigorously asserting legal rights in litigation is not, by itself, coercive control. Put simply: legal disagreement is not in itself family violence.
As one judge observed, “one litigant does not commit family violence against another litigant just by refusing to consent or submit to orders for which the opponent applies.”
This distinction is crucial for family law practitioners and clients alike. Allegations of family violence need to be supported by evidence of conduct that genuinely coerces or controls in the statutory sense, not merely evidence of robust parental (or even litigious) disagreement.
2. How the Court Interprets ‘Family Violence’
Section 4AB of the Family Law Act 1975 defines family violence broadly. It reaches behaviour that coerces or controls a family member or causes them to be fearful.
In Pickford, different judicial perspectives emerged on how broad that definition should be:
The majority view of the justices determining the case, emphasised that “family violence” is necessarily broad and protective in nature.
Their focus was on the impact of behaviour, and they were cautious not to let overly narrow definitions tamp down protections for those at risk.
The dissenting view or narrower interpretation of the remaining judges was that conduct should be evaluated objectively. That is coercive control must be demonstrated through the nature of the behaviour itself, not solely based on one party’s subjective experience or isolated incidents of conflict.
Practical Takeaways for Families:
Pickford offers key compass points when dealing with coercive control in the legal sense. It highlights that
🔹 Parental conflict and family violence: Robust disagreements, even if emotionally charged, aren’t automatically coercive or controlling.
🔹 Objective analysis is essential: Court findings must be grounded in evidence showing actual coercive or controlling conduct, not just perceptions of it.
🔹 Context matters: Judges must look at behaviour in its full context and assess impact, not just isolated acts.
🔹 Allegations carry weight: Because family violence findings are relevant to best-interests assessments for children, framing and proof really matter.
Why Pickford Matters
Carefully prepared evidence and affidavit material is often crucial to proving coercive control under the Family Law Act, which is often described as a pattern of behaviour or a serious of acts viewed as a whole.
Get advice before you act.
Contact Coastal Lawyers for clear, practical family law advice tailored to Central Coast families.
As former prosecutors and police officers Coastal Lawyers have extensive experience is providing trauma informed legal advice and strategies to Central Coast residents where family violence and coercive control are a significant feature.
Reminder: The above is legal information only and is not a substitute for obtaining tailored legal advice addressed at your unique family and situation.
by coastallawyers11 | Sep 5, 2025 | Coastal Lawyers
When it comes to family law disputes, many people come to mediation after months of lawyer assisted negotiations or discussions between themselves.
By then, they’re often firmly attached to their legal “rights” and positions. While knowing your rights and understanding the strengths and weaknesses of your case is absolutely essential, mediation requires a different mindset.
Instead of focusing on winning or losing, mediation works best when both parties are willing to move from their starting positions.
A successful mediation isn’t about victory; it’s about compromise. In fact, the hallmark of a good outcome is that both parties leave feeling a little disappointed. A sense of “I could’ve got more.” That’s not failure; that’s balance. It means both of you sacrificed something in order to reach an agreement.
Why Compromise is Worth It
So why agree to something less than your “ideal” outcome? Well in my experience as both a seasoned family lawyer and an Accredited Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner is there are four main reasons:
1. Cost
Litigation is expensive. You might fight over $10,000, but by the end of a drawn-out case, you could spend $100,000 to $150,000 in legal fees if it goes to a full final hearing. Mediation allows you to resolve matters far more affordably.
2. Emotional Wellbeing
The toll of conflict isn’t just financial. Prolonged disputes can deeply affect your mental health and wellbeing.
More importantly, if children are involved, ongoing parental conflict can be profoundly damaging. Research shows extended exposure to conflict can even alter a child’s brain development. No parent wants to look back and realise that legal battles over dollars and cents cost their children peace of mind and stability.
3. Time
Court proceedings are rarely quick. Even after your first court date, which may take 6 to 12 weeks to arrive you’re often simply sent back to further directions, mediations, report preparations or adjournments. It’s common for matters to drag on for 18 months or more. By contrast, a mediated agreement can be drafted into consent orders and finalised within weeks or months depending on the complexity and issues in dispute.
4. You get to decide
What many do not realise is that when you go to court and are involved in litigation. You are paying for a judge to decide what should happy to your family and your finances. In mediation however, you get to maintain control over what happens. When you are involved in litigation, who ‘wins’ will depend on who presents the best evidence on the day(s) of the trial and how the judge assigned to your case assesses that evidence.
The Harsh Reality of Litigation
If mediation fails, litigation often becomes the next step. But here’s the reality:
- Over time, costs escalate while assets often depreciate. You are already losing.
- Conflict tends to increase, not decrease.
- Litigation fatigue sets in, leaving families drained financially and emotionally.
- The court process is slow, and the “big day” in front of a judge may be years away.
- In many cases, the final court order looks very similar to what could have been achieved in mediation years earlier or sadly worse because now emotionally and financially a toll has been taken.
When Court is Necessary
The court system is crucial for keeping families safe. If there are serious concerns like family violence, abuse, or unacceptable risks to children, the court is the best place to ensure protection and accountability. In those circumstances, litigation is not just appropriate but essential sometimes. This is where having an experienced family lawyer is crucial to understanding your particular unique case and needs.
However, in cases involving modest asset pools such as a home, cars, superannuation, and savings mediation often provides the fastest, least damaging path forward.
Final Thoughts
Mediation isn’t about giving up your rights or “losing.” It’s about making a clear-eyed, practical decision for the sake of your finances, your wellbeing, and most importantly your children. By approaching mediation with the right mindset, you give yourself the best chance of moving forward sooner, lighter, and with less regret.
If you would like to learn more about mediation, this blog post is written by Kristal Naividi of Olive Mediation and you can find out more at http://www.olivemediation.com.au
by Kristal Naividi | Nov 23, 2022 | Coastal Lawyers
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